Hi everyone! For February, I want to talk a little about my life before and after having children.

Before having children, I wasn’t really living the way I should have been. I knew who God was but not like I know Him now. Growing up, I was never taught how to have or grow a relationship with God. I didn’t know all of the basic things that really I should have known. I was probably on my way to hell to be honest.

I found out that I was pregnant with AJ and I had to leave school for his safety. I immediately stopped doing every wild thing that I was doing and prayed, “God, I feel like this is you saving me. Lead AJ and I to the church you want us to be at nd help us learn more about You."

I started praying more. I went to one church before AJ was born but I didn’t really feel like it was our "home." A lot was going on between AJ's father and I and on one emotional night, I cried out and asked God to reveal if I was supposed to be with him or not. He revealed that he was not who He wanted me to be with. So, I was very specific in my next prayer and told Him that I wanted a man who knew God, who would love my children and I, and keep us in church. 

After having AJ, I fell into postpartum depression. I was always alone. I had no help with anything. I was trying to do homeschool but my mom was always at work and she couldn't help me with things I didn’t understand. I gave up on school. I was 14 and trying to figure out how to raise a newborn.

My grandmother would keep telling me, “Biyankah, God has you alone for a reason. I know right now it seems bad but He’s getting ready to do something.” That was the start of me getting to know God. I really began to seek God and what His plan was for my life. I didn’t know that there could be more than this.

One day shortly after, I felt Him tell me to pray over my home. I kept seeing AJ was getting pushed down by something. After I prayed over my home, the next morning, my grandmother confirmed that I did the right thing and explained how and what she saw. My grandmother became by guidance in the spirit. I very so much appreciate her for teaching me and praying for me on this journey.

Fast forward just a little...
I found out that I was pregnant again and this one was terrifying. With AJ, pregnancy and labor was perfect but with Aurora I had complications from the day I found out to even after I had her. I had complications so bad I even told MK, “If I do lose the baby, then it is God's intention and He knew of something that didn’t need to happen in the future.” He replied, “You really have crazy faith.”

[I met MK about 3 months before I got pregnant. He is not the biological father to either of the children we have but he has stepped up as a father to them.]

Throughout my pregnancy Aurora, I constantly stayed in prayer for us. After I had her I had to have emergency surgery and that really troubled me with my faith. I was freaking out. MK, as the faith ful partner he is, reminded me, “Biyankah, where is your faith?” That really calmed me and gave me comfort. He prayed with me before surgery and cared for our daughter while waiting on me to come back.
That’s something I love about our relationship. We are a praying family!

Now, we are married, I am getting back into school, and I have gaven my life to Jesus..fully. I am on the right track . 

Since making these necessary changes, placing myself around people who encourage growth, and started following Jesus, I have experienced so much more joy.

I never knew I could be so happy.
I’m so blessed that God has given me my two beautiful children and wonderful husband.

It all came with small steps of correction. God blesses obedience.

xoxo- Biyankah